Can’t spell, won’t spell
On hearing of the new Scots Spellchecker programme, ‘Canny Scot’
Cannae spell, winnae spell – lay it oan thi line:
when it come tae orthaegraphic skills this laddie disnae shine.
Eh cannae spell ‘MaGonnagal’, Eh cannae spell ‘Renaissence’ –
hoo Eh feel aboot this flaw is becummin raw complaysance.
If Eh cannae spell in English dae Eh huvtae spell in Scots?
Is meh joattur filled wi crosses when thi proablem is wir nots?
Wir not a singul naishun and therr’s not a singul tongue:
we talk wan wey gin wir aalder and anither if wir young;
we talk diffrent in thi Borders than we dae up in thi Broch;
wir meenisters talk funny when they skate oan frozen lochs.
Huv ye seen hoo Lech Walensa’s Roabin Wulliums wi a tash?
Huv ye noticed hoo Pat Lally’s kinna nippy wi thi cash?
Well yi widnae if yir sittan wi yir heid stuck til a screen
trehin tae spell oot whit ye think insteid o seyin whit ye mean.
